Sunday Shindig Turns Skinny

The weekly shindig held every Sunday at the Hoban has been known for occasionally making a detour into the gutter. Yesterday's shindig was relatively tame. With the exception of local business woman Anastasia Christensen pole dancing for two hours, fully clothed oddly enough, the shindig was rather wholesome by Washtown standards.
After the shindig was officially over, however, most of the crowd stayed at the Hoban and quickly located the gutter. After a quick change of clothing, the DJ joined Miss Anastasia on a dance pole. In the interest of full disclosure, the DJ was yours truly. These two dancers were quickly joined by two more, local residents Johanna Zerbino and Paris Greenspan. From there things went delightfully downhill, as the crowd somehow enticed the dancers to do what dancers on poles usually do. Torn bits of clothing were rapidly scooped up as souvenirs, and those in attendance showed generous appreciation for the dancers. Drink sales at the Hoban dropped to near zero as the crowd seemed to be intoxicated by the beauty of flesh on display. Luckily, the drop in sales was more than made up for in tips.
For those of our readers who left early, or who were unable to attend the shindig, don't worry. There will be another one next Sunday, and while not every shindig is as revealing as this one was, a fun time can always be guaranteed.

Explosions Destroy Spaceport!

A series of explosions rocked through parts of Washtown this afternoon, completely destroying the spaceport. Preliminary investigations point to a ruptured fuel line at the spaceport as the origin of the explosions. The explosions triggered a collapse of the abandoned tunnels underneath the spaceport, killing two workers and injuring three. The remainder of the spaceport employees were luckily all on an extended lunch break at the Hoban, although rumor has it a few may have been seen entering the Chicken Ranch. The proprietress of the Chicken Ranch (and Editor-in-Chief of the Weekly), Anastasia Christenson, heard rumbling but figured it was the excitement inside the brothel and didn't see anything outside. She was shocked to hear later that the spaceport had collapsed, but was grinning and remarked, "Damn I didn't mean to shake the earth that much."

The cause of the fuel line rupture is unknown at this time. However, just hours after the explosions, the home of spaceport official Deiter Meyer mysteriously burned to the ground. Sources who wish to remain anonymous have provided the Weekly with information that suggests this is not a coincidence. Mr. Meyer was unavailable for comment, obviously busy finding the next ship off world.

Repairs to the weather monitoring station in orbit around the planet are nearing completion, and ships are being encouraged to dock there for their trade for the time being. Small shuttles can still get to and from the town, but use is limited due to a lack of landing space. The manager of the weather monitoring station issued a brief statement suspiciously soon after the explosions. "The crew of Washburne Station regrets the loss of our ground-side facilities, but we are eager to remind travellers that our docks will be online shortly and ready for business."

The Weekly wishes to extend our condolences to the family and loved ones of those killed in the explosion, as Washburne Station apparently does not care. Rest assured, we will continue to investigate the cause of this explosion, and if negligence or sabotage is discovered to be responsible, we will see that justice is done.

-OOC from Ana - Well the Lindens have picked our sim to put a road through it. In the process they took down our walls. We are working quickly to redo things so that the ugly stays out. Pardon our mess as we redo things and I will get with you all soon to explain the new town layout, that is as the info becomes available to me. This has thrown us for a loop but we will get it back on track shortly. Hold on this may be a wild ride but in true firefly spirit it will be an exciting one. Until we know exactly what we're going to do, we ask all residents to please do not put down any prim heavy items or build any extensions to their current residence.

Raven Roleplay News

Shay Jiutai has stepped down as the GM for roleplay for the crew of the Raven. Jadi Goodliffe will be taking over those duties. Jadi tried to send out a short notice through the Washtown RPG group, but technical difficulties may have prevented many of the group members from getting the message.

"Heya, folks- Sorry about the delays! Looks like the plot proper should be taking off again next week (4/30) after I'm better able to get up to speed on everything and get organized. You folks have been busy!" - Jadi Goodliffe

Boat Full of Companions Adrift!

Breaking News from Shay Jiutai - The Persephone Companions' Guild field trip to study the art of the ancient tea ceremony from the equally ancient monks at a hill top monastery on Hera went smoothly enough. However, the chaperone, one Tillery MotherHen, skimped on the first-class transport for the return trip. The Hornet is an able enough boat, and the crew lead by Captain Shiro Takai, is an honest bunch, if a bit rough around the edges. Unfortunately, mechanical troubles have beset the boat and she is adrift, awaiting assistance from the willing and able crew of Raven.

OOC Comment: Come join the fun this Tuesday night at 6PM SLT, as a Companion, or one in training. IM Shay Jiutai for details

Absent Mayor Found!

Many of the current residents of Washtown likely have never met our duly elected mayor, Cabridges Fanwood. Cab was one of the early residents of Washtown. Unfortunately, he has not been able to be around in world very much over the past year. We miss him here, but are happy to report that he has his very own webcomic! Save Hiatus tells the story of a group of people who are rabid fans of a tv show that was cancelled after a short run. Sound familiar? The tv show in the comic is called Hiatus, and is fictional, but the basic premise should hit very close to home for all browncoats. It looks great so far, so go check it out and help support one of our own!

The Blue Sun™ Trademark Kerfuffle

by Sanpierre Juran, Business Commentator

In recent days there's been considerable outcry about The Blue Sun™ Company's new rules for the use of The Blue Sun™ trademark.  Our shops are enjoined never to advertise simply "Blue Sun," but henceforth always "Blue Sun™ Cola" or "Blue Sun™ Beverages."  Business reporters are dictated the permissible (few) and impermissible (many) ways to refer to the company and/or its products.  Ordinary residents are being told how they are to refer to the company's products in the course of their own ordinary daily discourse - which, to many, feels much like being told, yet again, how to live their lives.  Predictably, all are irritated, some are agitated, and a few are outraged.

Yes it is annoying and yes it's inconvenient and yes in some ways it's very stupid.  But it's wrong to blame Blue Sun (sorry, the Blue Sun™ Company) for it.

This aspect of trademark law is very old, going back to the days of earth-that-was.  It wasn't popular there, either.  But it was just one of those things that hit every substantial company and brand at some point in their lives.  It was annoying every time it happened, just as annoying as it is today, but they had to do it.  And while it caused a hiccup or two, they got through it, as did their customers and their (when applicable) fans, and life went on.  I've been there myself.

Once upon a time I was affiliated with one of the large inner-planet corporations.  Never mind which one, because this story could have happened at any of them (in fact, did, everywhere).  Someone there had invented a hugely popular programming language, and a department - soon to become an entire division - had formed around it to commercialize on its popularity.

For it surely was popular.  Not only did it solve a lot of people's problems, it had a cool logo and a catchy, short name that everybody liked, though I'll just call it [popular programming language] here.  Front-page articles touted the [popular programming language] Revolution!  [Popular programming language] user groups appeared spontaneously across city after city.  Books - some good, some not - appeared with [popular programming language] on their covers.  A couple of magazines, too.  The [popular programming language] brand was on fire.

Then, of course, the lawyers had to step in.

"Listen up," they said.  "We have to tighten down on the legalities or we'll lose control of the trademark.  If we lose control, any idiot can call his own system [popular programming language] without our approval, and that would be highly dilutive of value.  Henceforth, treat our trademark as a proper adjective which must always modify a specific set of nouns taken from a list we will provide you.  So from now on, you don't write a program in [popular programming language] or run it in [popular programming language].  You write it in the [popular programming language]™ Programming Language, and you run it on the [popular programming language]™ Virtual Machine.  When you talk about the two of them together, it's the [popular programming language]™ Platform.  You got that?  Tell your customers, affiliates, and press contacts the same."

"But that's completely stupid and annoying!" we said in unison.  "And unenforceable too," a few of us might have added under our breaths.

"True," the lawyers said.  "But irrelevant.  What matters is that we demonstrate intent to protect our trademark, by making a good-faith effort to comply with trademark law in all aspects, regardless of how stupid it is.  Good-faith effort equals proof of intent to defend equals legal protection.  Lack of any of those things equals greatly diminished protection."  

They paused for Q&A and few of us snuck out to go online and do the research.  The lawyers were right.  Every company with a substantial brand does this.  They don't want to.  It doesn't make their employees or anybody else happy.  It doesn't add market share.  It costs money to redo every piece of literature, advertising, media and related propaganda that goes out the door according to the new rules.  It's just a big headache all around.  But they do it anyway, all of them, because this is how it is.  You have to take exactly these steps to keep your rights to the brand.  Otherwise you lose control of it, and then other people go and use your mark without your permission, and pretty soon your mark is no longer taken as a promise of quality in the marketplace, which is a very big problem, because that's what marks are for.

So we put up with it, and did our part.  We rewrote our stuff to use the marks correctly, and we pushed others outside the company to rewrite their stuff as well.  They didn't always do it of course, but we did make a good-faith effort to get them to do it, and from the legal standpoint, it was that demonstrated effort, not the results, that counted.  Kind of like in kindergarten.  And the [popular programming language]™ brand went on, and grew in importance.  Trademark challenges - including one from a famously rapacious, sociopathic, and highly successful rival - were fought and defeated.  A decade later, the brand is still strong and nobody feels put out or abused by any of it, because in the end they realized it wasn't a holy war, or an attempt to shaft anybody, it was just the ordinary business activity of realigning a few ultimately trivial words to better fit legal reality, once someone woke up and realized what the legal reality was.

The bottom line is, don't let this trademark thing get to you.  It doesn't mean what people are imagining it means.  It's simply a necessary part of the process of being in business, and it will soon be absorbed and internalized...and ultimately watered down to imperfect compliance and normalcy, just like all things.  The annoyance is temporary.  So forget about it, and join me for a drink and we'll find other things to talk about.  You can look for me in Washtown.  I'll be setting up a round of BS™ Lawn Bowling over by the vending machine, if I can find a flat spot.

WASHTOWN WEEKLY ARRIVES!

Washtown, Burnet's Moon - The rumors circulating around town for weeks now are true. After several months without a local news source, Washtown once again has a newspaper to call it's own. The Washtown Weekly officially turned on the presses today after weeks of planning. The Weekly strives to be the definitive source for the truth in Washtown. We will always tell it like it is, not like how some big corporation wants it to be.

Washtown has been without a local news source since the Washtown Wave sold out and left for bluer and more purple pastures on the planet of Persephone. The Wave's publisher and editor, Tillery Woodhen, was once a well liked resident of Washtown. Greed, however, got the best of him and the Wave became the Cortex News Service and moved it's headquarters to the city of Downing on Persephone. The CNS has since expanded considerably, distributing it's so called news throughout the verse. This reporter is still curious how a small town newspaper publisher on a remote moon, whose residents are mostly struggling just to make it to the next day alive, managed to obtain funding for such a rapid expansion.

Washtown deserves better than Mr. Woodhen. The Weekly now makes this promise to the citizens of Washtown. We will always tell the truth. Come rain, shine, purplebellies, or blue hands, we will make sure the real news is always delivered. We will not sell out, and we will not back down. You can't stop the signal!

OOC P.S. - Just to be clear, the above story is all in fun. We love Tillery to death. He's been a resident of Washtown for a long time, and we will always consider him one of us, because he is. We will have a mix of IC and OOC stories and news posted here. A regular feature will also be Straight Talk, a combination gossip column and advice column written by three of the "working" women of Washtown - Anastasia Christensen, Lena Lei, and Mystik Chemistry. Sanpierre Juran will also be a regular reporter for the Weekly. If you have any story ideas, or if you need advice from the women of Straight Talk, let us know.